Nick Kennedy, Gonzalo Garcia

This is for all those people who don’t quite understand the beautifully brilliant game of rugby…

1.Your free time may suddenly disappear

2.You definitely won’t learn any important life lessons

3.Or that the best way to deal with the tough things is to face them head-on

4.Because spending Saturday afternoon’s playing with your mates is absolutely terrible

5.And there’s definitely no risk that it might make you fitter and healthier

6.There’s no risk whatsoever that you might enjoy yourself


7.You’ll never learn to respect fellow players and officials

8.There are definitely no opportunities to meet new people

9.And socialising with team-mates is strictly forbidden

10.Don’t even think about fraternising with the opposition

11.You will never get the opportunity to go and see new places

12.Believe it or not, winning at all costs does not mean cheating

13.Eating and drinking more won’t cause you to gain weight