I played in some rugby games where the only support you got was a jock strap, in cup matches where several hundred would turn up and in a 7s tournament at Twickenham before a 70,000 crowd.

To be honest it never bothered me much (although I was pretty keen not to make a complete twat of myself at Twickenham) – I played because I loved the game, the camaraderie and the occasional game where I didn’t get injured.


As far as I was concerned the main benefit of having someone on the touchline was more that they could drive me to A & E rather than any wildly enthusiastic cheering being involved. However, there’s a baseball team in Korea who are desperately keen to have madly passionate fans egging them on. Trouble is they are not having such a good run of form at the moment, having lost 400 matches over the last 5 years.

Understandably the locals have decided there might be something more fun to do – like sticking their heads in buckets of ice water maybe. This team though are nothing (like their scores) if not ingenious and they are filling the once empty stands with robots –


These can apparently sing, chant (presumably in Korean) and even do a Mexican wave if they get bored. If this catches on over here there are some teams we played against that might want to boost their support – mind you in the West Country they’d need to teach these mechanical farm hands to talk in a weird accent, drive tractors and learn to gob on the opposition when they were in spitting distance (sic).


Maybe they could also use them during the week to pull up turnips. Back in London we played some rather posh old boys teams and the need would be to programme them to come up with stuff like “I say old chap that’s just not cricket” whenever their blokes were getting a good shoe-ing. However, the main thing all these androids would need to do is to learn to drive and to navigate to the local hospital!